Special Report : The Sun NewsGroup
Special Report from LapLand Daily (A Proud Member of The Sun NewsGroup)
We are all screwed by Christmas Culture!
A very upset female reindeer in Lapland together with her feminist lawyer and the Association of "Stop Fluffing the Children" Society, is suing all person/s that is involved in propagating the song "Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer" for damages.
Evidently, "Rudolph” is not...I repeat NOT a male reindeer, as any environmentally friendly and animal loving activitist will know the fact that only Female Reindeers have anthers during this period of time. Henceforth, any reference to the address of “Rudolph” as a “He” is deeply offensive to the newly formed “Female Reindeer Rights” Movement.
The court date is set to be on the 23rd of Dec. A multiple of charges will be brought against the defendants. One of the co-defendants of the case is Mr Santa Claus himself. The main plaintiff (female reindeer) is suing him for emotionally trauma, as the “Red-Nose” mentioned in the offensive song is referring to a particularly unfortunate acne incident she had on that particular Christmas eve. “That bloody fat man does not have to tell the whole damn world about my “acne on the nose” does he?” sobbed the poor reindeer. “He’s a fine one to talk when he wobbles around in that tight tight “sore-to-the-eye” red coat of his” said the indignant reindeer.
The Association of "Stop Fluffing the Children" Society representative as quoted in the initial court hearing: “It is our duty of God fearing citizens to all bear responsibility in ensuring that our children grow up in reality, so as to spare them the cost of psychiatric care in their later teens.” Currently in addition to all the protest activities at every Disney Movie launch, the great society is also involved in court suites against the Henderson Brothers, Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy.
Meanwhile in the spirit of Christmas Cheer, Let us join the Lawyers in singing: “….let us sue, let us sue, let us sue…”
We are all screwed by Christmas Culture!
A very upset female reindeer in Lapland together with her feminist lawyer and the Association of "Stop Fluffing the Children" Society, is suing all person/s that is involved in propagating the song "Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer" for damages.
Evidently, "Rudolph” is not...I repeat NOT a male reindeer, as any environmentally friendly and animal loving activitist will know the fact that only Female Reindeers have anthers during this period of time. Henceforth, any reference to the address of “Rudolph” as a “He” is deeply offensive to the newly formed “Female Reindeer Rights” Movement.
The court date is set to be on the 23rd of Dec. A multiple of charges will be brought against the defendants. One of the co-defendants of the case is Mr Santa Claus himself. The main plaintiff (female reindeer) is suing him for emotionally trauma, as the “Red-Nose” mentioned in the offensive song is referring to a particularly unfortunate acne incident she had on that particular Christmas eve. “That bloody fat man does not have to tell the whole damn world about my “acne on the nose” does he?” sobbed the poor reindeer. “He’s a fine one to talk when he wobbles around in that tight tight “sore-to-the-eye” red coat of his” said the indignant reindeer.
The Association of "Stop Fluffing the Children" Society representative as quoted in the initial court hearing: “It is our duty of God fearing citizens to all bear responsibility in ensuring that our children grow up in reality, so as to spare them the cost of psychiatric care in their later teens.” Currently in addition to all the protest activities at every Disney Movie launch, the great society is also involved in court suites against the Henderson Brothers, Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy.
Meanwhile in the spirit of Christmas Cheer, Let us join the Lawyers in singing: “….let us sue, let us sue, let us sue…”
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